


Fell On Black Days

by Martienne



Series: Fan mixes [3]
Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Fanmix, Gen, Music
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-01
Updated: 2014-03-01
Packaged: 2018-01-14 03:24:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 735
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1250980
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Martienne/pseuds/Martienne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There is never only one turning point. For Leonard Church the darkness in his life came to penetrate his soul. But it wasn't just something that happened to him. It was a choice. <a href="https://open.spotify.com/user/texelations/playlist/75UmZ2AUZYgyZIGDJfZAU5">Listen on spotify</a>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fell On Black Days

**FELL ON BLACK DAYS**

-( [a fan mix](https://open.spotify.com/user/texelations/playlist/75UmZ2AUZYgyZIGDJfZAU5) )-

**I Grieve [[lyrics](http://www.songmeanings.net/songs/view/68303/) ] – Peter Gabriel**

                ((  _this flesh and bone / is just the way that we are tied in / but there's no one home / I grieve for you_  ))

Leonard Church was always a driven man. That didn’t change when he lost his young wife, but carrying on gave his work a different bent. There was nothing worth doing that wasn’t in her memory, even if he keeps that to himself, away from the others who just wouldn’t understand.

**Fell On Black Days [[lyrics](http://www.songmeanings.net/songs/view/3949/) ] – Soundgarden**

                ((  _so what you wanted to see good has made you blind_ _/ and what you wanted to be yours has made it mine_  ))

Consuming himself in his work doesn’t make up for properly mourning. The deeper he digs himself in, the darker his thoughts become. His work becomes simply a means to an end. 

**Fragments [[lyrics](http://www.songmeanings.net/songs/view/3530822107858827448/) ]- Rocky Votolato**

                ((  _document a scattered mind / where the waves fall, like the soldiers that die on the shore / seaside ghosts now_  ))

Now that he has direction there’s much work to be done. In blazing new trails in his field in the name of what he lost, keeping records on what’s being done is more important than asking questions about whether it should be done.

**It’s Not Too Late [[lyrics](http://www.songmeanings.net/songs/view/3530822107858798090/) ] – Shipping News**

                ((  _I thought my enemies knew they would want to hurt her_  ))

The pattern is set now, and each session draws out a new AI. Breaking the broken right up to the creation of Epsilon, who cries out against the death of a shadow.

**John The Determinist [[lyrics](http://www.songmeanings.net/songs/view/3530822107858831173/) ] – Jeremy Messersmith**

                ((  _hoping for a ghost inside the shell_ _/ but if it's there it's hidden well / all we are is ticks and tocks / seconds in a pocket watch_  ))

The Director is far past the point of being able to see the morality or the ethics of what he is doing. He knows best, and he’ll do what it takes to eliminate objections.

**Memory Loss – This Will Destroy You**

In the end, those who he answered to didn’t see the importance of his work, and he knows he’s the one who is ultimately going to be held accountable.

**Bitter Sweet Symphony [[lyrics](http://www.songmeanings.net/songs/view/463/) ] – The Verve**

                ((  _I'll take you down the only road I've ever been down / you know the one that takes you to the places_ _  
where all the things meet_ ))

There’s nothing to do now but contemplate how futile it’s all been as he waits for those who intend to arrest him for following his own conscience.

**Fly Low Carrion Crow [[lyrics](http://www.songmeanings.net/songs/view/3530822107858685655/) ] – Two Gallants**

                ((  _it's just you and me and my rib-caged brain / we polish the brass and we dust the pain_  ))

He doesn’t try to evade his captors, but he also has no intention of turning himself in. When no one arrives to apprehend him he’s left to his own devices, trying to cope with the way things ended on his own. He’s never properly mourned for a thing in his life, though, and he doesn’t intend to start now.

**Second Self-Portrait Series – Rachel’s**

He’s failed at everything now, even at remembering her, which was the only thing he ever truly cared about at its root. .

**Another You [[lyrics](http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/ofmicemen/anotheryou.html) ] – Of Mice And Men**

                (( _take away all of this emptiness I feel / 'cause I will never find another you_ ))

Instead he’s left to contemplate how living this way has destroyed him.

**Still Here [[lyrics](http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/digitaldaggers/stillhere.html) ] – Digital Daggers**

                (( _every night, I dream you're still here / the ghost by my side, so perfectly clear_ ))

He mourns and remembers, always in his own way. And maybe, he thinks, he can still make it right.

**The End Of The Line [[lyrics](http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/metallica/theendoftheline.html) ] - Metallica**

                (( _drop the hourglass of time / spilling sand we will not find_ ))

He comes to realize, with Carolina's arrival, that there's nothing more he can do.

**Let It Die [[lyrics](http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/starset/letitdie.html) ] - Starset**

                (( _And you left me more dead / than you'll ever know / when you left me alone_ )) 

With the crash of a bullet it’s up to him to make his failure complete.

**The Unforgiven III [[lyrics](http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/metallica/theunforgiveniii.html) ] - Metallica**

                (( _How can I be lost / in remembrance I relive / so how can I blame you / when it's me I can't forgive?_ ))

In his final moments, he reflects on what's gone wrong and how he's to blame. 

**The Living [[lyrics](http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/nataliemerchant/theliving.html) ] - Natalie Merchant **

****

                (( _I'll go off, I'll make myself scarce / come tomorrow / you won't find me here_ ))

****

And his ending comes without fanfare.

****


End file.
